Are parents today not playing their role as a true parent in raising and disciplining their children?

Are parents today not playing their role as a true father and mother in raising, upbringing, and disciplining their children? Some say that parenting today has lost it's sense of meaning, that parents would rather be ';friends'; with their children instead of parents, fearing that their children will not return any love to them if they punish or discipline their children.Are parents today not playing their role as a true parent in raising and disciplining their children?
I agree with you - a lot of parents do want to be friends with their kids, which makes it hard to then turn around and discipline them. I think some parents don't want the hard job of discipline or punishment - well, too bad, that is a lot of what parenting is! Don't have a child to have a friend, that is what other adults are for. Usually the healthiest relationships between parents and children are traditional. I don't mean old-school beating the kid, I just mean the parent is the authority and the child is well...the child!


I have seen a lot of youngerparents going back to traditional methods and I hope this is a positive sign.Are parents today not playing their role as a true parent in raising and disciplining their children?
Let's see, you're what - about 24 -28? You have the perspective of a nearsighted apple.





The basic feelings you described have been a part of many parents' attitudes for literally millenia. Parents who love their children and hope for the best for them often try to be friends and nurturing allies rather than big scary monsters.





';Traditional values'; these days is code language for ';spare the rod, spoil the child'; - which is KNOWN to be the WORST way to raise children.





Discipline is of course necessary in paenting - but beatings and abuse are NOT discipline.





Why don't you get an education before you DARE take on the task of raising children. START with Bruno Bettleheim's ';A Good Enough Parent.'; And all the REST of the clodheads who answered here should try it, too.
You answered your own question:';that parenting today has lost it's sense of meaning, that parents would rather be ';friends'; with their children instead of parents, fearing that their children will not return any love to them if they punish or discipline their children'; That's the answer right there..
Considering my 11 month old gets attacked by monster toddlers at the play grounds we take him to, and the fact that I get tripped up in the stores by ratty children running and screaming while their parents shoot daggers at me for even NOTICING their little angels Iam going to have to say NO, parents these days just suck.





The sad thing is in 10-15 years these little monsters will be the assholess we all have to deal with every day in the world around us.





Its such a wonderful cycle of idiots breeding.
110% absolutely true. I am 41 yrs old and I remember getting spanked when I did something bad, but I didn't hate my parents, I had more respect for them. Now that I have my own daughter (14 yrs old), I've had problems with her too, but she didn't escape her childhood without any discipline. I spanked her when she did something wrong. But, I stick to my guns that children need parents first and if there is room, which there should be, you can be their best friend too! My 14 yr old daughter is sitting here next to me as I type this, and she just kissed the side of my head, so I'd say I must have done something right. Bottom line, children need discipline! It shows you care.
Correct. Most parents are not raising their children. They choose to institutionalize them as babies and expect teachers to do parents' work. And then people wonder why there are so many problematic children....
For the most part you are correct. I am a parent, to a 1 year old. My wife and I have tried to teach her how to act. Our daughter is the one in the resturant who people say oh wow I had no idea there was a baby here. I agree parents want to be friend with their children. I also know parents who discipline their child and than they feel so guilty they run out and buy them the newest toy.





If and when the time comes that my daughter says she hates me, it will of course hurt but at the same time my wife and I will know we did our job.
YES!!! Parents need to be just that... PARENTS!!! They don't want to discipline their kids cause they don't want to hurt their kids feelings. By doing this, they are not creating boundries for their children. People wonder why kids are getting into trouble more and more these days. Well... this is why. Parents need to step up to the plate and be parents and lay down the rules.
I agree, but I don't think it's the ';being friends'; part that's wrong. I think parents today are much more passive, even the ones who stay at home.


My parents never spanked me or hit me, but they knew to set limits, and they didn't expect the TV to babysit me. Both of them worked full-time, but they made sure to spend at least couple hours of quality time with me every day. I wasn't scared of my parents, but I respected them.


I did fine in school, never had problems with alcohol,drugs, teen pregnancy or anything of that nature, and I didn't misbehave.
It's true. A lot of parents would rather be a friend, because they are afraid if they tell their precious little snowflake ';no'; on something, their baby will ';hate'; them. It's ridiculous. People need to start stepping up and being parents, or stop having children. The way I see it, if you want a b.f.f. - go outside and play. Meet someone. Having a child is a whole other responsibility. You need to be a parent first, best friend second.
I have a five year old daughter, I believe in disciplining children and know that it has to be done in order for children to learn socially acceptable behaviors, rule and guidelines, self control ect. When I was pregnant with my daughter I said that we were going to be friends and that I wanted her to be able to tell me everything and that I would definatley be ok with it when she did because I was going to ba a ';cooler'; parent than my mom was. With a little expereince now I think my mom did a great job.. I still think it would be nice for my daughter to trust me with secrets and problems when she gets older but I'm not counting on it!!
Yes, that is exactly the problem. Parents don't want to be parents. It's going to ruin society in general, more and more each year. I see it all the time with my students. I do what I can be being a parent to my children and will teach them to do the same when they are parents. I don't need friends that much younger than me. It's sick.
I punish and discipline mine but I have 4 and it is hard to keep on it all the time, I admit to slacking in that department sometimes but I think parents do try to be friends and kids don't need a friend they have enough! I wish we all can get a free day with nanny 911 maybe we all would be better parents, I try but it is very hard with a 7 and 4 year old and 4month old twins, but my kids know right from wrong and we can go to the store, out to eat with no problems so at their ages I think I'm doing good! my husbands more of the disciplinary!
I agree. Although I am against corporal punishment, kids still need firm, consistent discipline. And what a lot of kids don't have now is parents to guide and teach them. It's disturbing how many parents these days are working all the time and dumping their kids at daycare all day, basically letting the daycare raise them. I think the main problem these days is that families never spend time together anymore.